Extra attention & looks

My children seem to get attention no matter where they go.  Yes, I'm biased and think they are all wonderful but they always do.  My oldest always has a smile on his face (99%)...my middle child has a deep voice that sounds like the Godfather (people really stare at that one)...and Hailey likes to high 5 people and play shy.  Overall they are good mostly well-behaved...my middle son will occasionally get a little rambunctious but it is still winter in the Midwest and we don't always get all his energy burned off.  In church, I generally get compliments from older members of the congregation that they were very well-behaved (hmm...I wonder if that is because one or more of them fell asleep during mass!) and Hailey enjoys a good game of peek-a-boo around mommy to see who she can get to smile at her.  However, I have found since having Hailey people stare more.  As a typical mom....I "assume" it is because she has such beautiful eyes, who can resist those dimples, and that giggle is contagious.

However, recently, I have become more realistic.  People are curious.  It is human nature...they want to "know" consequently, they are "nosy".  Some people still don't realize that she has Down syndrome but I think overall, they do.  Some people know another person with Down syndrome and see her beauty inside and out.  Some have never met anyone with Down syndrome and want to know more.  Does she sit quietly in the corner like a wallflower?  How does she behave?  Does she throw tantrums?  Is she well-behaved or a hellion?  How do her parents act with her?  How does she relate to her siblings?  Does she talk/babble or is she quiet?  Is she "lazy" or does she move around?  Is she strong or does low tone mean weak?  Is she "sickly"?  What can she "do"?   I do believe that there are people in this world that are ignorant and will choose to stay that way.  I have little patience or energy for them.  But the people who are genuinely curious and want to know more...go right ahead...I will answer almost any question you have about my daughter or Down syndrome.  I would much rather them ask and be curious than look away and ignore.

Overall, we have not had many bad or uncomfortable experiences.  We get the typical, "oh, they are always so happy"...well, she's not a breed of dog...so unless they are referring to all my children lumped together...you can leave out the "they".  This person has obviously not seen my daughter when her parents are not getting her bottle quick enough or have left her in the room when she wants held.  The girl is NOT always happy....she has a grumpy streak.  Some people make odd comments.  At preschool drop-off the other morning, a mom said, "oh, I just love it when she sticks her tongue out".  This made me cringe.  We had been doing so well with keeping Hailey's tongue retracted until she started teething.  We are working so hard on it and it was the one thing this mom commented on.   I had one lady tell me what a rough road we had ahead of us.  I just shrugged and said, "don't all parents"?

To all the people who stare out of curiosity, here are a few answers to your questions....

She plays well with her brothers

They love her very much

Her cousins love to play with her

She likes everyone to know she is here.

She plays with her toys

She is mischievous & gets everything she is not supposed to have

She is NOT always happy

She plays so hard, she doesn't care where she naps

Her parents are head over heels for her

She has daddy wrapped around her little finger

She is a baby...just like her two older brothers.  She basically has done and is doing the same things they did at her age.  She has hit a few of her milestones a little later than they did but overall, she has been an easier baby than the two of them.  Not to mention...she sleeps through the night! 

I'm happy to help educate anyone on Down syndrome and our "normal" life, but as my mom told me growing up, "if you don't have something nice to say, keep your mouth shut".