Sometimes my brain gets so tangled up with what's "typical"...what Hailey is developmentally behind in...what she is on target with...what we need to work on...what she has mastered that I don't "see" the big picture. I'll be honest...on a daily basis, Hailey is the only child I see with Down syndrome and she is the only 1 year old I see. Most of our world consists of other 5 and 8-9 year olds. Then when we do see another 1 year old, he/she seems to be lightyears ahead of Hailey in everything and they seem to be about 5 pounds bigger. Yes, my brain knows that all children develop at their own rate. Yes, I realize Hailey was over 4 weeks early. Yes, I realize she lost at least 4 weeks of gross motor due to open heart surgery (and how difficult everything was before her heart was repaired.) And, YES, I know I am not supposed to "compare" children. In my mind, I know all these things and they are rational. But my heart gets a little bruised when we are around children the same age as Hailey and they are running circles around her.
Last night was different. We were at my oldest son's end-of-season soccer party. The parents were playing the children. I was sitting on a blanket with Hailey when I look over and see another little peanut sitting a few feet from her. She was close to Hailey's size so I "assumed" she was about 9 months old. I was pleasantly surprised to find out she was a little over a year...she wasn't walking but cruising. She was crawling around, emptying the stroller basket, and happily drinking her bottle. Hailey crawled through the grass to get to the little girl. (I've been trying to get her to crawl through grass for 2 months!) For those that know Hailey....it wasn't the little girl she was trying to get to....it was the bottle!
So in my long drawn out way, yesterday I had it shown to me that truly all children develop at different rates...those with 46 chromosomes and those with 47. I, also, decided that yes, my daughter will be just fine with other children her age.
Hailey's favorite pastimes (quite similar to her brothers at this age)
- climbing the stairs (when she thinks I'm not looking)
- getting into the bathroom (when we forget to shut the door)
- emptying the diaper bag (until mom found one with a zipper)
- climbing on her brothers
- scoping the couch for goodies..remotes, Nintendo DS, phones, iPads
- stealing food from others
- eating grass and leaves
- boycotting naps
Here are some pics of Hailey just being a 1 year old:
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| Oh...you caught me |
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| "More, more, more" come on boys...I want more! |
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| Mom, they are both feeding me! |
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| Snaggletooth enjoying her watermelon |
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| Hmm...Ian left a snack up here. |
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| Playing with my piggy bank while Mom and Dad work. |
There is such a wide range for development. Colin walked at 10 months and then didn't talk until he was 2 and a half. Experiencing Colin's development has made me more relaxed about Ben. I know he will do things in his own time!
ReplyDeleteI still compare, although nothing like I did when Samantha was 1. It's hard not to! But I'm glad you saw that perspective, that kids develop at their own pace, regardless of number of chromosomes. :-) Hailey's perfect!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweetie. Love her hat. Yeah, comparison is hard. Just had a playdate yesterday with a 10 month old that is beyond Cora in gross motor by far. But to tell you the truth, Cora had way more fun! Comparing is never fair.
ReplyDeleteMiss Hailey is doing fabulously. I love all of the pictures--especially one where she got into the diaper bag with all of the money on the floor. Smart girl! I still compare. I know I shouldn't, but it is what it is. We all do it whether our kids have 46 or 47 chromosomes. Like Becca said, you the perspective first hand that kids develop at their own pace :)
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